EP1 – To niche or not to niche plus talking self sabotage with guest Rachel Watson

Ok so today I’m going to be talking to you about why you need a niche for your business. And one of the prominent reasons a niche can help you to grow your business. I’m also going to be talking to a guest a little bit later on called Rachel Watson about self-sabotage in business. It’s an interesting discussion about the ways we stop ourselves from moving forward.

Do you need a niche in business?

But first to niche or not to niche,

I often get asked whether I need a niche. What I do think is that niching down helps you in a number of ways. It helps you with getting your messaging, right. It helps you with finding your people and it helps you to refine your service so that it meets your customer need or want, think about it, like the difference between public speaking and one-to-one calls on zoom

In public speaking you’ve got no idea who is listening into you in the room. You’ve got no idea who they are or what type of business they run. You’ve got no idea what keeps them up at night or where they want to be in a year’s time. You can’t talk to them in their language because you haven’t heard them speak. You talk generically because you can’t talk [00:02:00] individually

In the different way, on a one-to-one call you typically know who the person is before the call. And you’ve got a good idea of what the call is all about. They might’ve told you what they’re struggling with and what they’ve already done to try and fix that. You can ask them what their hopes and dreams are, and you’d know where they are in their business journey. Or you can find out very quickly. You’ve heard them and so you know what kind of language they use. You can tailor what you say to them individually. This helps you talk to them in a way that will appeal to them and you can help them to find a solution while you’re on the call.

Why niching down is important

But what if you’re not sure who your niche is?

I work with someone who really doesn’t know when I ask him who will buy his service, he hums and haws. When I asked him what he’s selling and how it helps his customers, he says, he’ll get back to me. He never does. When he, or, he talks to me about the features [00:03:00] basically, and not about the benefits to his customer.

When I asked him how he’s going to find customers to talk to, he’s got really no idea. This means he doesn’t know what to say or where to focus his marketing or how to connect with this potential customers. And that’s what niching helps you with. Niching helps you to know your audience.

You get to know what they worried about. You get to know what they call it, their problem, their struggle, their goals, their desires, the thing they need help with. You have a clear idea of what you can do to help them and you can tell them about it. You know, where, or you can find out where they spend time and not in a stalking kind of way. You can talk to them as if they, you are with them on a one-to-one call, speaking directly to them. They’ll respond better to that.

Now I hear you. Some of you are doubting me, but what about all those people who are not in my niche, Annette? Does that mean I never get to work with anyone else again? Aren’t I limiting my business by [00:04:00] niching? That’s not what I’m saying at all. I’m saying spend the time and get to know your ideal customer, your niche and your potential customers will find you and respond to you.

The message will resonate with them. Sometimes they’re not your ideal customer, but they still think that you can help them. If they’re not in your niche, you can then make a decision about whether you can help them and you can make an offer to work with them, or not, depending on how you feel. So does that make sense? To find out more about working with me on how to build your niche and to start building your audience from scratch visit annetteclubley.com.

Self sabotage in business – why do we do it?

Next I’m going to be talking to Rachel Watson. Rachel is a certified hypnotherapist and rapid transformational therapist who is based in Sydney, Australia, and works with customers around the world on what holds them back in their business.

We’re going to be talking about [00:05:00] self-sabotage.

Okay, so thank you very much, Rachel, for joining me today. So today I’m going to be talking to Rachel Watson who runs a company called realign your reality. And I have known Rachel for a little while now. We worked, we’ve worked together in the same mastermind group. And it’s been interesting to see how she works on mindset for women entrepreneurs.

So, Rachel what are we going to be talking about today?

Rachel Watson: Well, I thought a really great topic would be self-sabotage because what I’ve found is that we can really, really want to have a successful business and we can have all of the reasons in the world. You know, we might be fed up with working in the corporate world. We’ve had too many dickheads for bosses and we’re sick of the nine to five. [00:06:00] And we’re sick of having to ask someone every time we want to take a break. And so the idea of creating our dream life, where we’ve got our own choices of how we, we use our time, it’s flexible and we can create the lifestyle that we want. That’s very appealing to people. So we can really really want it and have compelling reasons why we want the successful business of ours. But if we’ve got some underlying thoughts and beliefs about ourself that can really stop us from moving forward. So at a conscious level, we want this business that we’re creating, but at an unconscious level, these mindset blocks pop up and stop us from moving forward.

Annette Clubley: Okay. Yeah. Yeah, because you know, on the face of it, everybody is saying, I want to run my own business. I want to be successful. I want that freedom. I want to be able to, whatever that freedom buys them, whether it’s more time with the family or traveling time or whatever it is, whatever the goal is, we all, in theory, are aiming for that. [00:07:00] So why do you think we are so prone to self-sabotaging?.

Mindset in business

Rachel Watson: Well, like I said, it’s these underlying thoughts and beliefs we have. So it’s a little bit like if you think about our subconscious mind is a little bit like the operating system on our phone and the conscious mind is a little bit like the apps.

And so sometimes we are actually running an out of date, old operating system that isn’t compatible with the new apps we’re trying to install. And so we formed these beliefs about everything when we’re tiny. So from that from even before we’re born through to the age of about seven or eight, You know, we’re where we don’t have logic at that point in our lives, we’re totally a hundred percent emotion.

And we use all of our senses to learn everything there is to learn about the world. So, you know what little babies are like, they’re putting everything in their mouth. The, you know, the looking around the hearing, things that touching things. [00:08:00] And that’s how they learn. So the, the things that we hear see and experience during those formative years, they form our belief about everything and a classic example would be what’s our belief about money, you know, perhaps you heard mum and dad arguing about money when you were little. And so you formed a belief that money is a bad thing. And so you work really hard to get rid of all of the money that you’ve ever earned. Or maybe your parents used to say things like money doesn’t grow on trees, or maybe they talked about people who had money as being greedy and bad people.

And so we hear all these things and we’re watching and we’re listening and we’re taking it all in when we were little and we formed these beliefs. And so when we’re adults and we’re stepping into new situations, Here’s the thing, here’s the thing about our mind. It’s so amazing. It really just wants to [00:09:00] protect us and keep us, keep us safe.

So often we’re stepping into these new opportunities. We’re creating our business. It’s unfamiliar, we’re learning all sorts of new things and our brain goes, hang on a minute. What the heck are you doing? This is unfamiliar where you could be in danger and our brilliant mind can’t tell the difference between real and perceived danger.

So for example, jumping onto a live video, our brain sees that as, just as life threatening as jumping into the lion enclosure at the zoo and giving the lion a cuddle, it can’t tell the difference. And so it sees what we’re doing as a threat and it puts the brakes on and we find 1,000,001 ways to avoid that thing that we want most of all, whether that’s procrastination, whether that’s suddenly, we’ve got an extreme interest in cleaning our house from head to toe. You name it we’ll find 1,000,001 [00:10:00] ways to, self-sabotage the thing that we want most of all, because underneath it all, it feels like it’s not safe primarily.

Annette Clubley: Okay. Really fascinating. Well, who doesn’t know an under seven that’s absorbed something that you don’t want them to absorb.

Rachel Watson: Little sponges, aren’t they?? Everything we say. And sometimes you say words that we really didn’t mean to say them, you mean know your, you are with some friends or something and you hear the parroting them out

Annette Clubley: Yes, yes or recounting a story that you really would rather that they didn’t tell about you

Rachel Watson: Absolutely, absolutely

Annette Clubley: Saying something out loud in front of a whole group of people. Yes, definitely. I’ve definitely suffered from that. Can you tell?

Rachel Watson: I can, I’m getting

Annette Clubley: I really love the analogy of the phone and the apps, the operating system and the app.

Rachel Watson: Yes,

Annette Clubley: because I think that that’s quite easily understandable. And I mean, you, you, you, you don’t think that things from your very [00:11:00] early childhood are still affecting you as an adult.

Rachel Watson: That’s right.

Annette Clubley: It’s not something that you, you know, it’s not something that you think about all the time. It’s not something that you realize and then go, oh, well, I know what that is, that is, you know, when I was four kind of thing.

Rachel Watson: That’s exactly right. And, but we upgrade our devices don’t we?. In fact, we have it set up usually so that all of that happens in the background. So we don’t even have to be bothered with it, but we forget about upgrading our most important piece of technology, which is the bit that sits between our left ear in our right ear.

Annette Clubley: Yeah. Yeah, yeah, absolutely. Absolutely. And I think then, you know, the next thing I was going to ask you was, well, what can we do about it? So how can we upgrade our system? How do we get past those blocks? You know you know, how do we get, how do we recognize? I think initially what it is that was self-sabotage. And what we’re doing as a self-sabotage, whether that’s procrastination [00:12:00] or cleaning the house from top to bottom, and then what can we do about it?

Self sabotage – how to stop

Rachel Watson: Well, I think the awareness comes when we know that we passionately want something, whatever that is, whether it’s in the area of business, whether it’s about losing weight, whether it’s about becoming fitter, whatever it is, we know we want it, but it feels really heavy.

And it feels hard and it feels like we’re struggling and it doesn’t matter what we do and how hard we try. We just can’t seem to get any further. And, and particularly when, you know, you’re, you’re building a business. And like I said before, you’ve got such compelling reasons why this is something that you want, but you just can’t seem to get there.

And you’re investing in the courses and you’re investing in the coaches and you’re doing all the things that they’re telling you to do but you’re just not getting there and it just feels hard and it feels like you’re struggling. So I think that’s [00:13:00] the awareness level of, you know, what some something’s not right here.

There’s a block there. I don’t know what it is. I don’t understand why I can’t take action and I can’t get this done, but something’s not right. And what I find when I work with my clients is often they come to me knowing that there’s something wrong, but not having a sense of what it is. And it’s not until we can actually quieten down that chatter that we experience at a conscious level, you know, the little running commentary that we often have about everything we do and say that’s on 24 7, and it’s got a hell of a lot to say about what we’re doing and what we’re doing well and what we’re doing badly and what we should do better all the time. So if we can quieten that down and we can actually get in touch with the source of where all of these thoughts and beliefs are, then we can understand [00:14:00] exactly what the root cause of the block is. Now I’ve found for myself because I’ve got an extremely chattery mind. It’s quietened down a lot now, but I have struggled in the past with meditation because my mind chatters and it goes off in all sorts of directions and I just can’t still it down enough to focus on, on getting to the root of the issue, so I have found hypnosis is a fabulous tool. It quietens down my mind and it allows one of the analogies that I love to use is it’s a little bit like, you know, when you go into a corporate organization and there’s often a very, very efficient person at the front desk and she manages the boss’s diary. And if you want an appointment with the boss, the decision maker, you can’t get one unless you get past that person at the front desk and the receptionist that’s a little bit like the conscious mind of ours. And so in a session with me, I say let’s to send that chatty [00:15:00] receptionist out for coffee and let’s have a chat with the decision maker. So let’s tune into your subconscious mind while you’re relaxed. And the chatterbox is quietened down and still down and let’s find out what’s going on.

And it’s a very interactive process. People often think that hypnosis means that you’re asleep or you’re unconscious and you’re not aware and it’s completely the opposite. It just means that you are more aware of that unconscious level. You’re more relaxed and you’re more suggestible. And so we can ask questions and we can ask what the reason is for these blocks. What’s the belief that was formed at a younger age. And it could be at any age. I mean, I’ve said, you know, zero to eight, but things happen during our life that cause us to take on different beliefs that keep us stuck as well. So we ask the subconscious mind, what’s what’s this all about? What’s the reason why, and, and [00:16:00] we get the answers. The answers are all within us and being able to quieten down our mind allows them to come out when we’re asking these great questions and then we can join the dots and understand, ah, now I get it and we get that aha moment. And once we understand what the reason is, then we can, we can do the upgrade part and we can replace those old thoughts and beliefs with what we want.

Annette Clubley: And. Okay. Okay. So then the logical mind can take over or the conscious mind can then take over and go. Okay. So that’s what it is that was bothering me. But now I can think, okay, well I’m not a child anymore. I’m now an adult. I’m not actually in danger. I can move forward and do something about this.

Rachel Watson: Exactly. Because a lot of these thoughts and beliefs we formed were age appropriate.

Annette Clubley: Yes.

Rachel Watson: You know, it made perfect sense when we were four years old and mommy and daddy had a new baby and they were [00:17:00] focused on the new baby and we thought mummy and daddy don’t love us anymore. And we formed that belief that we’re not lovable.

You know, that kind of thing. That’s age appropriate at four years old, but it’s not age appropriate at 44 years old, for example, you know, and it’s a bit of a design flaw I think, but we really just need that upgrade to take those age appropriate thoughts and upgrade them into adult worthy thoughts and beliefs.

Annette Clubley: Okay. And so, yeah, so the hypnotherapy session takes you past the gatekeeper. Basically it takes you past the conscious thoughts and back to old memories or unconscious thoughts that are still holding you back from whatever you want in your life, whether that’s life or business. Okay. That’s really interesting.

So how do you typically work with people? How can people get hold of you?

Rachel Watson: The best place to get hold of me is in my Facebook group. I have a group that’s specifically for women who are wanting to put their [00:18:00] nine to five behind them and move forward into having their own business. So it’s called mindset matters for women moving from career to entrepreneur, bit of a mouthful, but it’s a great place to find me.

I tend to work with women one-on-one and I have a monthly package and it’s a combination of the hypnotherapy and the support and accountability. I make bespoke recordings for people from the session that we have together, so that they’ve got something to listen to each day, following the session to reinforce and embed those new beliefs that they want to have in their life instead of the old ones and we meet on zoom everyone meets on Zoom, we met on zoom on a weekly basis to have the accountability and support and encouragement and really set you up for success for the week ahead while all of this amazing transformation is taking place in your life.

Annette Clubley: Mm. Hm. And it’s that repetition? [00:19:00] Isn’t it? That recording is invaluable because it’s that repetition over a period of time, because you know that you don’t change overnight, that you need time to get used to a new belief.

Rachel Watson: Our mind loves repetition.

Annette Clubley: Yeah.

Rachel Watson: That’s why they say it takes whatever the, whatever the current trend is, 30 days, 60 days, 90 days to form a new habit. That’s exactly right. It’s that repetition.

Annette Clubley: Yes. Yes. And so that is gold, you know, it’s not only the session and the support sessions, but it’s also that recording that that person can then use on a daily basis for themselves, wherever they are.

Rachel Watson: It’s key.

Annette Clubley: And yeah, I think all of that adds up to a really helpful package. And so what’s the best way to contact you to book that? Is it website

Rachel Watson: I’d say, come and join my group. Get to know me. See what I’m all about. I I share content in my [00:20:00] group. I help people. I’m very engaged in my group. So that’s the best way to come and find out if I’m the kind of person that you want in your corner, being your cheerleader when you know, on those occasions, when you can’t be your own cheerleader and you need someone else in your corner, that’s me. I just love supporting and encouraging other women. S o come and check me out and find out if I’m your kind of person and whether on the right one to help you move forward in business.

Annette Clubley: Perfect. Perfect. Well, I can vouch for the fact that Rachel is a great cheerleader. She’s been amazingly supportive of me in my business and I’m very grateful for it. And also thank you for taking the time to join me today, Rachel. And I am, yeah, I will see you very soon in your group.

Rachel Watson: Thanks so much for the opportunity to talk to you today., Annette it’s been amazing.

Annette Clubley: No problem at all. You made it to the end of the episode.

Thanks for listening to self startups today. Don’t forget. You can find more episodes at my website, [00:21:00] www.annetteclubley.com. And you can find information about my free trainings. And my programs at forward slash learn. Look forward to seeing you there.

Contact Rachel in the Mindset Matters for Women Entrepreneurs Facebook Group https://www.facebook.com/groups/mindsetmattersforwomenentrepreneurs